problem 1 without this option checked the remote start never shut down till timer ran out even after turning ignition on and back off i was afraid it would shut off engine while driving if i left the shutdown option off. i was trying to get away from restarting engine a 2nd time after remote start.
A remote starter will not shut off by simply turning the key On then Off. It will shut down with the brake press. So, Key on, then press brake. Car will stay running and remote starter will shut off. If brake is pressed before ignition is turned on, the car will shut down.
Do that and get rid of the shutdown on door open feature and both the problems will solve themselves. The shutdown on door open is a safety/security feature, it will also relock-rearm the car.